Successful Snogging
by typebee
Summary: It was a generally accepted fact, that if one were to make James pleased, then they would be greeted with an insistent pair of puckered lips against their own, whether they liked it or not. Remus Lupin's first gratitude snog caused a multitude of reactions, including a dazed werewolf, and an incredibly jealous Sirius Black. WARNING- Sexual references and snogging. ;) Oneshot. RLSB.


Successful Snogging

It was a generally accepted fact that James Potter was much more affectionate than the average sixteen year old boy. In fact, if one were to meet said boy, they would generally find that he had little to no respect for other's personal space. None, in fact. It was also a generally accepted fact, that if one were to make James pleased, then they would be greeted with an insistent pair of puckered lips against their own, whether they liked it or not.

That was why, whenever that recognisable _look _appeared in James's eyes, whichever unlucky person in the immediate vicinity who happened to be within snogging reach, would get a _juicy one _planted on their nearest body part available. So often did this happen, in fact, that his friends had quite gotten used to these random snogging sessions, and accepted these displays of affection with nothing less than a roll of their eyes, and a good chuckle.

James had snogged Frank Longbottom, who had been in a state of paralysis for over a week. James had snogged Lily Evans, who had put _him _in a state of paralysis for over a week. Then there had been Marlene Mckinnon, quite a few poor third year students, and one or two of their own professors. The worst had quite possibly been when James had been latched at the lips to the one and only Peter Pettigrew. As an aftereffect, everyone who viewed this monstrous affair had been in a temporary state of extreme nausea.

Everyone in James Potter's immediate range of friends had been subject to his affections, including his best friend Sirius, who made quite a show of it. However, there was one person who had never experienced his snogging, and that was Remus Lupin.

It isn't to say that Remus had never sufficiently pleased James enough to get a smooch, just that Remus had learnt to predict when _those moods _were coming, and removed himself directly from the vicinity.

Lupin's status of never-having-been-kissed-by-James-Potter changed abruptly on what would seem to be a very ordinary day. James, Sirius and Peter were conversing over a crudely sketched plan for their next prank, whilst Remus sat hunched on his bed reading a battered copy of _Pride and Prejudice, _an irritated little twitch furrowing between his eyebrows at every cry of outrage coming from his friends.

"Can't we just _not _change the colour of the tentacles?" Sirius was saying in frustration. "Snivellus will look just as ugly without the tentacles being purple."

James sighed, tired from planning what Remus deemed a highly unoriginal prank, for over two hours. They had been grovelling over how to put a potion in the Slytherin's pumpkin juice to make their, _ahem, nether _regions sprout sparkling purple tentacles.

"But we know how to make them purple," Peter said in confusion, his rat like voice piercing through Remus's ears like a chainsaw. As he became more and more irritated with the incessant whinging of his friends, they only got louder.

"Yes! Peter! But we don't know how to make them sparkly!" James cried out, flinging his hands into the air.

Remus twitched.

"But- you were saying we didn't need to make them purple-" Peter whined.

"I meant sparkly," James grunted.

_'I could easily forgive his pride, if he had not mortified mine,' _Remus read, his eyes flicking desperately over the pages, his patience growing thinner by the second.

"Why do you need them to be sparkly, anyway?" Sirius asked, raising an eyebrow quizzically. "S'not like we'll be seeing the tentacles anyway."

Peter laughed automatically. James shot him a glare.

"It's more mortifying," he argued, "Now if we could just figure out how-"

But Remus had had enough. With a throaty moan, he dropped his book, and launched himself off of his bed towards his trunk. His friends looked up in surprise, as he rummaged hastily through his belongings. Their werewolf friend muttered in vexation, as he held up book after book, flicking occasionally through the pages.

"Erm, Moony, are you alright?" Sirius said slowly, as if talking to a startled animal.

Remus had obviously found what he was searching for, as he held up his copy of _Advanced Potion Making _with a flourish.

"There!" he cried, flipping to the page he was searching for, and pushing it under the flabbergasted noses of his three friends.

"Moony," James cried, "You found us the _sparkly _potion!"

"Good on ya' mate," Peter said encouragingly, even as Remus rolled his eyes hopelessly.

Sirius shot him his dazzling grin. "Thanks Moonbeam," he said proudly, staring at him with a thinly veiled affection. Remus barely had time to shoot him an appreciative smile, before an all to familiar phrase burst out of James's mouth.

"I bloody _love _you sometimes, Lupin," he said, breathily. Remus had no chance to escape, no time to back away, before James had launched himself at him, and had attacked his mouth fiercely. Remus fell backwards onto a nearby bed in his surprise, as James snogged him thoroughly.

When the bespectacled boy pulled away with a grin, he was met by a range of stares from the boys in the room. Peter sported a slightly amused expression, Remus a thoroughly dazed one, and Sirius... well, he looked positively murderous.

Lupin's hair stuck up at odd angles, as he launched himself to his feet, jaw dropped, eyes wide.

"You just snogged me," he commented.

"I did indeed."

"YOU JUST SNOGGED REMUS!" Sirius burst out in rage, clenching his fists, and jumping away from the precious prank plans, which fluttered in disarray onto the floor.

"Oh dear," James said, smirking in satisfaction, "Did I make you upset?"

Remus was fully functioning now, perplexed at Sirius's reaction, and completely forgetting about his volume of _Pride and Prejudice, _which was now eagle spread on the floor, the pages folded unceremoniously. Usually, he would be disgusted at himself for treating a book in such a way, but his dark haired friend looked absolutely livid, his face flushed a deep crimson.

"You aren't supposed to snog Remus!" he was saying, hands gripping the ends of his hair. James smirked.

"Well, I simply couldn't hold in my passions for him any longer," James said dreamily, "His sexy rumpled hair just drives me _wild_-"

With a murderous yell, Sirius launched himself at James, tackling him to the floor.

James continued. "His arse just _does _things to me," he said huskily, followed by an indecent moan, which had Remus blushing, and Sirius growl.

"And, _Oh Merlin, _he gives a _heavenly _hand-job, let me tell you," he forced out, despite the hands tightening around his neck.

"Shut _up!" _

"Oh, I see," James choked out, still laughing despite the life-threatening position he was currently in, "You wanted me to ravage _you, _not him_!"_

Sirius bared his teeth.

"Jealous little bugger, aren't you?"

"No, you sod! _I_ wanted to snog _Remus_!"

All at once, a deafening silence took over the dormitories. Sirius glanced up guiltily at Lupin, who had seemed to, once again, lose any sign of coherent thought.

"We'll just... go then," James muttered, snickering, rolling out from beneath his friend, grabbing Peter by the arm, and making a quick escape. The two remaining Marauders stared at each other in surprise, both with identical expressions of nervousness. The tawny haired boy cleared his throat awkwardly, after over ten seconds of no sounds but for their breathing.

"Do you really want to snog me?" he asked, timidly.

"Eh, where did you get that impression from?" Sirius burst out in a rush, his long hair obscuring his face, as he flushed in embarrassment. Remus stared glumly at his hands in disappointment.

Seeing this, Sirius sighed.

"Fine," he said loudly. "Fine."

"What, Sirius?" he challenged.

They stared at each other for a moment, before Sirius tore his eyes away.

"I want to snog you," he admitted, blushing. "I want to snog you, and kiss you good morning even though you have beastly morning breath, and I _really _want to shag you."

Both boys were crimson faced now.

"I've wanted to do all that, and more, for a while now," Remus said softly, causing Sirius to look up in astonishment.

"You fancy me too?" he asked hesitantly.

"Yes."

With that, he launched himself at his werewolf friend, in a similar fashion to how James had, who was currently eavesdropping by the door, but recoiled in horror at the sound of his best mates lip-locking.

It was a very sloppy kiss, but one which was thoroughly mind blowing for the two of them, and rather enjoyable. When Sirius pulled away with a _pop, _he said breathily, "Go to Hogsmeade with me?"

"I always go to Hogsmeade with you," Remus replied with a devilish smirk, which twisted Sirius's insides uncomfortably.

"Go with me as my date," he said, his slanted eyebrows _daring _Remus to disagree.

Lupin smiled.

"Of course I will, you prat."

And with that, Sirius leaned down and snogged him once more.

The door flung oped, breaking the two out of their kiss. James stood proudly in the doorway, looking at the two of them fondly, as if they were his personal project which had proven to be successful.

"I suppose this means I can't snog Moony again?" he asked innocently, to which Peter laughed from behind him, as if it were the funniest thing in the world.

"Never," Sirius growled, throwing a protective arm over his newly acquired, _possibly_ boyfriend. Remus grinned contentedly, ruffling a hand through his already mussed up hair.

It seemed that, for once, James Potter's complete disregard for personal boundaries had not put anyone into a coma. In fact, if James were to be daring, which he always is, he would say that his snogs had been rather successful.

"Oh come on guys," he cried in exasperation, as mouths were put to better use than talking, "Just because you two have years of pent up sexual frustration doesn't mean you have to take it out in front of me!"

Well, it depends on what he classified as successful.


End file.
